SOLO BY THE PLUMBER.
"I SCAMP the joints. I scamp the drains.
I am an artful Plumber;
You'll feel my hand in winter's rains,
You'll sniff it in the summer."
"I dig, I delve, I patch, I pry,
And lay the pipes so badly,
That even bland Surveyors sigh,
And tenants chatter madly."
(Here the Jerry Builder breaks in with his Jeremiad).
"I build my floors on rags and bones,
Or lush organic matter;
Or where the grass in swampy zones
Grows greener and grows fatter."
"My doors are sure to warp in time,
My slates let in the water;
Take equal parts of dust and slime.
And there you have my mortar."
"I build my wall with many a trick,
So shrewd as to astound one;
With here and there a rotten brick,
And here and there a sound one."
The Artful Plumber resumes his plaint;—
"The sewer-pipe I love to lay,
Connecting with the cistern;
And where's the law that dares to say,
The tenant should have his turn?"
Finale by the Pair:—
"Why, here's a Judge who would restrain
Our right to scatter fever!
Should this decision stand, 'tis plain
We can't scamp on for ever!"
Punch.