THE MAY QUEEN.
(New Version, adapted to existing Climatic Conditions).
[CONSIDERING apology superfluous, Mr. Punch offers none, as the Poet Laureate will doubtless approve the modification of his beautiful lines, rendered needful by recent meteorological conditions.]
YOU must wake and call me early, call me early, mother dear;
To-morrow'll be the tryingest time of all the Spring, this year—
Of all the Spring, this year, mother, the dreariest, dreadfullest day;
For I'm to be Queen o' the May, mother, I'm to be Queen o' the May.
There'll be many a red, red nose, no doubt, but none so red as mine;
For the wind is still in the East, mother, and makes one peak and pine:
And we're going to have six weeks of it, or so the prophets say say—
And I'm to be Queen o' the May, mother, I'm to be Queen o' the May.
I sleep so sound all night, mother, I am sure I shall never wake.
So you'd better call me loud, mother, and perhaps you'll have to shake:
I shall want some coffee hot and strong, before I'm called away,
To shiver as Queen o' the May, mother, to shiver as Queen o' the May.
As I was coming home to-night, whom think you I should see
But DOCTOR SQUILLS! And he saw that my nose was as red as red could be;
And he said the weather was cruel sharp, that I'd better stay away,—
But I'm chosen Queen o' the May, mother, so I must be Queen o' the May.
The honeysuckle round the porch is white with sleety showers,
And, though they call it the month of May, the hawthorn has no flowers;
And the ice in patches may yet be found in swamps and hollows gray,—
Ain't it nice for the Queen o' the May, mother, so nice for the Queen o' the May?
The East wind blows and blows, mother, on my nose I follow suit,
For my influenza's so very bad, and I've got a cough to boot;
Perhaps it will rain and sleet, mother, the whole of the livelong day,
Yet, I'm to be Queen o' the May, mother; I must be Queen o' the May.
I've not the slightest doubt, mother, I shall come home very ill,
And then there'll be bed for a week or more, and a long, long, doctor's bill;
And with prices up and wages down however will father pay?
But I'm to be Queen o' the May, mother—oh bother the Queen o' the May!
So please wake and call me early, call me early, mother dear,
That I may look out some winter wraps, fit for the spring this year.
To-morrow of this bitter "snap," I'm sure 'twill be the bitterest day,
For I'm to be Queen o' the May, mother, I'm to be Queen o' the May."
Punch, May 12, 1877.
Truth had a long parody describing the visit in 1877 of Dom Pedro, Emperor of Brazil, whose early rising, and insatiable appetite for sight-seeing were the topics of conversation. Two verses are sufficient to indicate the style:—