THE SONG OF HIAWATHA.
(Author's Protective Edition.)
YOU, who hold in grace and honour,
Hold as one who did you kindness
When he published former poems,
Sang Evangeline the noble,
Sang the golden Golden Legend,
Sang the songs the Voices utter,
Crying in the night and darkness,
Sang how unto the Red Planet
Mars he gave the Night's First Watches,
Henry Wadsworth, whose adnomen
(Coming awkward for the accents
Into this his latest rhythm)
Write we as Protracted Fellow,
Or in Latin, Longus Comes—
Buy the Song of Hiawatha.
Should you ask me, Is the poem
Worthy of its predecessors,
Worthy of the sweet conceptions
Of the manly, nervous diction
Of the phrase, concise or pliant,
Of the songs that sped the pulses,
Of the songs that gemmed the eyelash,
Of the other works of Henry?
I should answer, I should tell you,
You may wish that you may get it—
Don't you wish that you may get it?
* * * *
Should you ask me, What's its nature?
Ask me, What's the kind of poem?
Ask me in respectful language,
Touching your respectful beaver,
Kicking back your manly hind-leg,
Like to one who sees his betters;
I should answer, I should tell you,
'Tis a poem in this metre,
And embalming the traditions,
Tables, rites, and superstitions
Of the various tribes of Indians.
* * * *
I should answer, I should tell you
Shut your mouth and go to David,
David, Mr. Punch's neighbour,
Buy the Song of Hiawatha.
Read and learn, and then be thankful
Unto Punch and Henry Wadsworth,
Punch and noble Henry Wadsworth.
Truer poet, better fellow,
Than to be annoyed at jesting
From his friend, great Punch, who loves him.
The following is a list of the names of some famous advertisers of thirty years ago, taken from Hiawater, a parody contained in "The Shilling Book of Beauty," by Cuthbert Bede (J. Blackwood, 1853):—
"Howlawaya, the quack doctor;
Mosieson, the cheap slop seller;
Mechisteel and Warrenblacking;
Camomile, the Pillofnorton;
Marywedlake, oaten bruiser;
Doctorjong, the great cod liver;
Revalenta, the Dubarrie,
Rowlandskalidore, and Trotman's
Doubledupperambulator."
Another scarce parody on the same original was entitled Milk-and-Watha, and an amusing skit was also contained in Gilbert's libretto to Princess Toto.
There is also a parody in Edmund Yates's Our Miscellany (G. Routledge and Co., 1857), and "Revenge, a Rhythmic Recollection," appeared in Tom Hood's Comic Annual, 1877.