In a Garden
As I walked along the paths this morning picking flowers, I found in the yellow heart of a Lady Slipper, a little brown bee. My first impulse was to shake him out of his honeyed abode, but as I looked at his velvety body and the sunlit rainbow wings, a foolish tenderness surged over me. Perhaps there were baby bees at home that would starve if papa bee did not bring back honey; and how useful this little creature was, carrying the pollen from flower to flower—so I moved on, leaving him unmolested. But even as I turned away thinking these pure, sweet thoughts, the darn thing stung me.
* * *
When Adam in bliss
Asked Eve for a kiss,
She puckered her lips with a coo;
With looks quite ecstatic,
Gave answer emphatic:
“I don’t care A-dam if I do.”
—Flo.
* * *
And she said I must Seattle as she rose Tacoma her hair, for if I wear my nice New Jersey, what will Delaware?
* * *
When Greek meets Greek—they open a fruit store; but when Irish meet English they open an uproar.
* * *
Beats me how these girls keep their dresses up. Must be strength of mind that does it.
Our Rural Mail Box
Dear Bill—Did you hear that they traded Manhattan for 24 cases of whisky and that now they want to trade it back? Yours till the Statue of Liberty shimmies up the Hudson, Flo.
* * *
Dear Captain Billy—I live at 268 W. Rayen Ave., Youngstown, Ohio, and the other evening I saw this question and answer in your July issue:
Dear Bill—What does my brother mean when he speaks of the “depth bombs” and “submarine chasers” in army hospitals?—Miss Curiosity.
Send a self-addressed, stamped envelope for reply.
I am sending same and hope to hear from you. Resp. yours, John Wilson.
(Editor’s Note—Dear Mr. Wilson: I have referred your letter to Miss Curiosity, who undoubtedly will answer you personally.)
* * *
Dot—A. is right. Get out and walk.
* * *
Rhoda—Yes. You are old enough to wear what you please. That is as far as your parents are concerned. But the police will not respect your age.
* * *
Madge—The Doctor was correct. After an operation for appendicitis the cut shouldn’t show.
* * *
Alden M.—Can give you no advice about free love. Always thought love very expensive.
* * *
Hazel—Do not marry the sixty year old millionaire. He’s too old and too young to bring you happiness.
* * *
Jacqueline—Jackie, for short, you said you wanted to write me the worst way. You did, I can hardly read your letter. Try again.
* * *
Ima Flirt—Yes, love is blind, as the old saying goes—but the neighbors are not. Pull down your shades after this.
* * *
Mable—If the day be muddy and the boys will stand on the corner it’s up to you to make good. Will speak to the cashier about sending you silk stockings.
* * *
Jim—If you are dancing with another man’s wife it is proper to let him see light between you.
Luscious Limericks
There was a young man from Art Creek,
Who went around dressed in batik,
When they asked, “Are you well?”
He replied, “Ain’t it hell?
But in Art it’s the very last shriek.”
* * *
Another young chicken named Mary
Was in love with a youngster named Larry,
And when it was dark
They went to the park,
And there they did tarry and tarry.
* * *
There was a young feller named Aster
Who went in a wild bullock’s pasture;
The sweater he wore
Made the poor bully sore,
And so he ran faster and faster.
* * *
A sculptor made nymphs and bacchantes,
Omitting the coaties and panties,
Till a kind-hearted Madam,
Who knew where they had ’em.
Donated some warm Ypsilantis.
* * *