Daytona Beach Ballad
Come all you reformers, if you want to raise ’ell.
Here comes a woman from the Breakers Hotel,
With dropped-stitched stockings,
And high-heeled shoes,
A pack of cigarettes
And a bottle of booze.
* * *
Always smile—It gets you something.
Our Rural Mail Box
Teny Sun—The best way to prevent your dog from suffering with the heat in July is to kill him in June.
* * *
Monk E. Byte—I’m sure I can’t answer your question as to why a girl’s eyelids drop down whenever she kisses a man. But where there’s no sense, there’s no feeling, y’ know.
* * *
Manicurist—I don’t blame you for refusing to manicure the nails of the fellow with St. Vitus’ dance.
* * *
Out West—If you are lonesome for Cape Cod, why not rub fresh herring on yourself and dream you are back home?
* * *
L. Bow—If your trousers are too short, pull up your shoes.
* * *
Hop Head—Flop your ears, there’s a fly on your neck.
* * *
Pope—Yes, Pope, we succeeded in making our own moon shine.
* * *