Come, Kiss the Heroine!
Dear Editor: While coming over to America on a steamer, the mate rushed up to me and threatened to blow up the ship if I didn’t give him a kiss.
What did I do?
I saved the lives of four hundred people.
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Lives of ’skeeters all remind us,
While short skirts are all the go,
That to them existence must be
Just one great big burlesque show!
* * *
Yes, Gus, ’tis sad but only too true that in Georgia the peaches grow on the limbs while at the beaches—but why break the monotony?
* * *
The hired hand, Gus, went to town the other night to a dance. When he got back he said that “nothing stands between certain dancers and pneumonia but a sense of loyalty to their employers.”
* * *
Oh, Myrt, do you know Aurora Borealis? They say she was all lit up last night.
* * *
No, Geraldine, Sandy Hook is not a Scotchman.
* * *
I was walking down the street the other day and on the far side was a fellow who looked familiar. “Hello, Bill,” I says. “Hello, Tom,” says he. “My name ain’t Tom,” I says. “Well, my name ain’t Bill, either,” says he. With that, I looks at him an’ he looks at me an’ sure enough, it was neither of us.
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