How Do You Get That Way?

A Jewish sergeant at Camp Lee in 1918 was explaining to a rookie the command, mark time, in the following manner: “Foist you raise yer right foot six inches in de air and then bring the left foot alongside the right one.”

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“Lovely day, don’t you think,” said the man as he hit his thumb with the hammer.

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Two Swedes went to Ireland

To kiss the blarney stone,

But they couldn’t catch their lutefisk

Where the River Shannon flows.

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Willie, your face has changed quite a bit.

Yes, mother, dear, I’ve been washing it.

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A change of wives ofttimes improves one’s disposition.

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