TO SERAPHINE.

Through happy years, that number now I ween

A dozen, or—to be correct—thirteen,

My comfortable better-half you've been,

O Seraphine!

The ups and downs of life we two have seen—

From Camberwell, of stucco-fronted mien,

To quaintly-decorated Turnham Green,

O Seraphine!

Till Grandma's money came with golden sheen,

You lent a hand at Sarah's weekly clean,

And did not tilt your nose at margarine,

O Seraphine!

And now that I've been made a Rural Dean,

Your figure is no longer slim, my Queen;

You'd scarcely make a graceful ballerine,

O Seraphine!

But after dinner as you doze each e'en,

From your disjointed mutterings I glean

Your mind is running on a crinoline,

O Seraphine!

Oh, let me not appear to speak with spleen—

Yet pause!—nor go to Madame Antonine

To get yourself a—you know what I mean,

O Seraphine!

For if that huge and hideous machine

Should thrust its bilious bulginess between

A blameless couple, such as we have been,

My Seraphine,

I will not condescend to make a "scene,"

But—if you needs must have your crinoline—

Good-bye!—you cannot have your Rural Dean,

O Seraphine!