TO HEBE.
(See the Report of the Lady Commissioners on Women's Labour.)
Waitress! with the dimpled chin,
Cap as clean as a new pin,
Here's a feather to put in!
For Miss Orme's report declares
That no male with you compares
In the showing off of wares.
Be it counter, be it bar,
You can "dress" it—you're its star,
Bright, and most particular!
Grievances you have, no doubt;
Which of us exists without?
Still, you do not pine or pout.
Standing with reluctant feet
Always ready, trim, and neat,
No one tells you—"Take a seat!"
Hours are long, and meal-time short,
Mashing bores, who think it "sport,"
Say the things they didn't ought!
Gather, then, the tips that fall;
Don't let vulgar chaff appal;
To the Bar you've had your "call"!
Con. for Competitive Sportsmen.—Q. What is the most unpopular thing in the (sporting) world? A. A "record," because it is always being "cut," by everybody, everywhere, every day.
