TRICKS UPON TRAVELLERS.
What means Train de Luxe? Peppery "PUNJAB" replies,
Two dirty sleeping-oars wherein one lies
Awaiting a breakfast; to feel disgust utter
At coffee, two boiled eggs, and plain roll and butter,
(Miscalled "Grub de Luxe," in the bitterest chaff,)
At the humorous price of four francs and a-half!
Item: Thirty-five francs for a bottle of brandy!
(A thing that—at breakfast—of course comes in handy).
A horrible dinner; no wine, and no beer,
Not even a soda your spirits to cheer;
No water to wash in at Turin—just think!
On arrival in France, not a drop e'en to drink!
What wonder poor "PUNJAB," who hails from the "Garrick,"
Got hungry as VASHTI, and dry as a hayrick?
An Edition de Luxe, as a rule, is a sell,
But a Train de Luxe sure as a fraud bears the bell,
Which promises travel more cosy and quicker,
And leaves you half starved, without money—or liquor!
KILLING NO MURDER!—A Correspondent of the Times, protesting against the assumption of combatant rank by the Army Surgeons, writes:—"A military doctor is armed, and like others is entitled to defend himself when attacked, but that is a very different thing from giving him full licence to kill." The Correspondent evidently overlooks the powers afforded by a medical diploma!
