MODEL RAILWAY MEETING.
SATURDAY last a General Annual Special Quarterly Meeting of the London and South-Northern Railway Company was held at the Company's Offices. The meeting had been convened to hear a report on the propriety of amalgamating the undertaking with that of the Great East And By Eastern Railway, for which junction, negotiations have been for some time in progress. The Hon. Rolling Stock, M.P., Chairman of the former Company, presided. The room was crowded with shareholders, and eleven fights took place before business was commenced.
The Chairman briefly explained the object of the meeting, and reminded those before him that they were men of business come to discuss a question of business, and he expressed a hope that nothing but business would be talked, as the riotous displays which had now become common on such occasions were not only degrading in themselves, but tended to shake the public confidence in a body which could so conduct itself. (Applause, and an old hat flung at the Chairman.)
The Secretary then rose to read the report, but not one word was audible, shouts of "We know!" "Shut up!" "All humbug!" "Gammon and spinach!" drowning his voice. He persevered in dumb show, however, until a volley of baked taturs, nearly all hot, supplied by a vendor who had been smuggled into the room by a shareholder, made him not only desist, but come round with an offer to fight the parties who were thus emphatically protesting.
Mr. Buffer then moved that the report be adopted. (Hideous yells.) Well, if it were objected to, let the reasons be advanced, and don't let fellows stand there, he added, with some irritation, howling like fools. (Renewed yelling.)
Mr. De Gradient seconded the motion, and would also be happy to be the previous speaker's second, if necessary.
Mr. Shunt said that the Chairman was a Nass, the directors were umbugs, and he had no term of decision—he meant derision—strong enough for the secretary, engineer, and superintendent of the traffic. The whole lot were revolutionary aristocratic donothings and sneaks. (Cries of "That's about it!" "Put that in your minutes!")
The Chairman said that in his private capacity he despised the taunts of the last speaker too much to condescend to notice them. But as Chairman of that meeting, and representing its dignity, he felt it his duty to say that of all the offensive rapscallions whose ridiculous gabble was ever permitted to contaminate the ears of gentlemen, Mr. Shunt was at once the most audacious and the most contemptible. He had no desire to be severe, but this statement was the mildest version in which he could clothe the truth. He should now put the motion. (Cries of "Yes, you'd better!" "Down, down!" and more volleys of baked taturs.)
Mr. Fitzpiston rose to protest. Not a word had been heard of the report, and yet they were to be asked to adopt it. (Loud applause.)
The Chairman: And whose fault's that? If the meeting had not made such an unbusinesslike row, they would have heard it all.
A Shareholder: It was a dodge of the Secretary's, who read low in order not to be heard.
The Secretary (in a dreadful rage): If I read low I hit high. Will the honourable shareholder come round here and try?
The Shareholder: No, you are our menial servant, and it's your duty to wait on your masters. (Vollies of applause and taturs.)
The Secretary was here restrained, with some difficulty, by the Chairman, from taking off his coat and chastising the meeting. During the discussion, quarrelling was going on in all parts of the room. At length, the Secretary being appeased into only caricaturing his enemies, upon his blotting paper, instead of beating them, the Chairman again rose, and put the motion.
Mr. Shunt leaped upon the table, and, taking a sight at the Chair, moved as an amendment, that the report be pitched out of window, and the Directors after it. (Applause.)
A Director (terrified): Police!
At this word the fury of the meeting became terrific. Cries of "That's the way shareholders are bullied!" "No crushers here!" and other indignant expressions broke forth; and for three-quarters of an hour, though various speakers tried to be heard, nothing resulted but gesticulation. At last the meeting, being hoarse, permitted a few words from
The Chairman, who explained that this question had been already discussed forty-two times, and each time with similar excitement. In the meantime another company was pushing on the same scheme, and would, by reason of the delay, take the wind out of their sails. (Cries of "All your fault!" "Swindling the shareholders!" "Directors ought to be kicked!" &c.) He would once more move, that the report be adopted, as nobody would state any objections. (Vociferous cries and yells—"No, no!" "Down with them!" "Twenty-five per cent. or nothing!" "No democrats!" "No exclusives!" "Bravo Rouse!" and so on.)
The Chairman then called for a show of hands, when everybody clenched his fist and shook it furiously at him. The Chairman, with a smile of triumph, declared the motion unanimously carried, and then, with the Secretary and the books, made a bolt through a side-door, before the meeting could rush in upon them, and prevent the success of this ruse. The meeting broke the windows, chairs, and lamps, and were then dispersed by the police.
Yet, with such centres of organisation, fault is found with the working of the Railway system. There's something wrong.
