"THE UPHOLSTERER TO THE MONUMENT."
We see, in the reports of the City Commission, that there is a situation with the above singular title. We wonder, in the name of everything that's wonderful, what are the duties of this curious functionary? What is there to hang, excepting the birdcage with the dingy canary, belonging to the porter, at the entrance door? There may be a few play-bills, also, and some steamboat placards; does "the Upholsterer" go every morning to hang these outside the railings? What is the furniture that is inside the Monument? and where is it stowed away? Or is the "Upholsterer" engaged to keep the flutes of the columns clean? Or is it his particular duty to rub up the Panorama of London that is viewed from its summit? There is no other picture that we are acquainted with, belonging to the Monument, excepting the picture of London's busy traffic across London Bridge, and surely this is a picture beyond the "Upholsterer's" reach? One would imagine from the fact of the Monument having an "Upholsterer," that there were chairs, tables, four-post bedsteads, curtains, and a regular houseful of furniture locked up inside it. We shall pay a visit to the Monument the first fine day there is no fog, and bring away with us an inventory of the furniture. In the meantime, we should like to be informed of the amount of salary of this "Upholsterer," who has to look after a place that contains no Upholstery.