Apropos of money, etc., why are lawyers such uneasy sleepers? Because they lie first on one side, and then on the other, and remain wide awake all the time.
And what do they do when they die? Lie still.
When is a lawyer like a donkey? When drawing a conveyance.
What proverb must a lawyer not act up to? He must not take the will for the deed.
Those who have me do not wish for me;
Those who have me do not wish to lose me;
Those who gain me have me no longer;
Law-suit.
If an attorney sent his clerk to a client with a bill and the client tells him to “go to the d——l,” where does the clerk go? Straight back to the lawyer.
Un filou peut-il prendre pour devise, Honneur à Dieu? Non, car il faut qu’il dise, Adieu honneur.
Why will scooping out a turnip be a noisy process? Because it makes it hollow.
What is the difference between a choir-master and ladies’ dresses, A. D. 1869? The one trains a choir, the others acquire trains.