Why is a widow like a gardener? Because she tries to get rid of her weeds.

Who was it that first introduced salt provisions? Noah, for he took Ham into the ark.

Short-sighted policy—Wearing spectacles.

A lightning-rod is attractive, in its way.

“This cheese is about right,” said John; and Jane replied that it was, if mite makes right.

What is an artist to do when he is out of canvas? He should draw on his imagination.

A professor of petrifaction has appeared in Paris. He has an ’art of stone.

“Ah!” said she to her diamonds, “you dear little things!”

After all, a doctor’s diploma is but an M. D. honor.

The desire to go somewhere in hot weather is only equaled by the desire to get back again.