Why is hot bread like a caterpillar? Because it is the grub that makes the butterfly.

A good side-show—A pretty cheek.

If a pair of spectacles could speak, what ancient historian would they name?—Eusebius (you see by us).

Why is a very angry man like the clock at fifty-nine minutes past twelve?—Because he is just ready to strike one.

Why is a shoe-maker like a true lover?—Because he is faithful to the last.

Why are there three objections to taking a glass of brandy?—Because there are three scruples to a dram.

In what respect were the governments of Algiers and Malta as different as light from darkness?—The one was governed by deys (days), the other by knights (nights).

When is a fowl’s neck like a bell?—When it is wrung (rung).

When is a man thinner than a lath?—When he is a-shaving.

When is a soldier like a baby?—When he is in arms.