Why is a vocalist singing incorrectly like a forger of bad notes? Because he is uttering false notes.
Why is your night-cap when on your head like a giblet pie? Because it contains a goose’s head.
Why are two laughing girls like the wings of a chicken? Because they have a merry thought between them.
When are a very short and a very tall judge both the same height? When they are judges of assize (a size).
Why is a thoughtful man like a mirror? Because he reflects.
Why is a pig with a twisted tail like the ghost in Hamlet? Because it can a tail (tale) unfold.
Why is a Turk like a violin belonging to an inn? Because he is an infidel (inn fiddle).
Why am I the most peculiar person in the company? Because I am the querist (queerest).
Why is a blundering writer like an arbiter in a dispute? Because he writes (rights) wrong.