Why does the east wind never blow straight? Because it blows oblique (blows so bleak).
What would be an appropriate exclamation for a man to make when cold, in a boat, out fishing? When, D. V., we get off this eau, we’ll have some eau-d-v.
How would you increase the speed of a very slow boat? Make her fast.
What should put the idea of drowning into your head if it be freezing when you are on the briny deep? Because you would wish to “scuttle” the ship if the air was coal’d.
What sort of an anchor has a toper an anchoring after? An anker (just ten gallons) of brandy.
Why was Moses the wickedest man that ever lived? Because he broke all the ten commandments at once.
Why should a candle-maker never be pitied? Because all his works are wicked; and all his wicked works, when brought to light, are only made light of.
Why can a fish never be in the dark? Because of his parafins (pair o’ fins).
When is a candle like an ill-conditioned, quarrelsome man? When it is put out before it has time to flare up and blaze away.
Why is love like a candle? Because the longer it burns the less it becomes.