Why is a waiter like a race-horse? Because he runs for cups, and plates, and steaks (stakes).

What sort of a day would be a good one to run for a cup? A muggy one.

Why are sugar-plums like race-horses? Because the more you lick them the faster they go.

What extraordinary kind of meat is to be bought in the Isle of Wight? Mutton from Cowes.

Why ought a greedy man to wear a plaid waistcoat? To keep a check on his stomach.

What wine is both food and drink? Port wine with a crust.

When a church is burning, what is the only part that runs no chance of being saved? The organ, because the engine can’t play upon it.

When does a farmer double up a sheep without hurting it? When he folds it.

When are sheep stationery? When turned into pens, and into paper when fold-ed.