"Bless you, sir," the wife declared proudly, "he's out of the Bible and into the newspaper long ago."
* * *
The physician advised his patient to eat a hearty dinner at night, without any worry over the ability to digest it. The patient, however, protested:
"But the other time when I came to see you, you insisted I must eat only a very light supper in the evening."
The physician nodded, smiling complacently.
"Yes, of course—that shows what great progress the science of medicine is making."
PROHIBITION
The objector to prohibition spoke bitterly:
"Water has killed more folks than liquor ever did."
"You are raving," declared the defender of the Eighteenth Amendment. "How do you make that out?"