The ardent lover heard the clock strike the hours—first nine, then ten, then eleven. At the sound of twelve strokes, he burst forth passionately:
"How fleet are the hours in your presence, my beloved!"
"Don't be silly!" the girl chided. "That's pa setting the clock."
TIT FOR TAT
The prize bull-dog attacked a farmer, who defended himself with a pitchfork, and in doing so killed the dog. The owner was greatly distressed, and reproached the farmer.
"Why didn't you use the other end of the fork," he demanded, "and just beat him off, without killing him?"
"I would have," the farmer answered, "if he had come at me with the other end."
TOBACCO
The native pointed with pride to two doddering ancients hobbling painfully down the village street, and informed the stranger:
"Them fellers is the Dusenbury twins—ninety-eight year old!" The visitor was duly impressed, and asked to what the pair of venerable citizens attributed their long life.