* * *

Mrs. Green to Mrs. Jones (who is gazing at an aeroplane): "My word! I shouldn't care for one of them flying things to settle on me."

* * *

The Woman: "Jazz stockings are the latest thing, dear. Here's a picture of a girl with them on."

The Man: "What appalling rot! Er—after you with the paper."

* * *

Small Invalid (to visitor): "I've had a lot of diseases in my time—measles—whooping-cough—influenza—tonsilitis—but (modestly) I haven't had dropsy yet."

* * *

THE SERVANT PROBLEM

Lady: "And why did your last mistress——"