Vicar's Wife: "What are you children doing in daddy's study?"
Ethel: "It's a great secret, Mummy. We're giving daddy a new bible for his birthday."
Vicar's Wife: "Oh—and what are you writing in it?"
Ethel: "Well, you see, we thought we'd better copy what daddy's friends put in the books they give him, so we're writing, 'With the author's compliments.'"
* * *
THE OBSTACLE
George: "I proposed to that girl and would have married her if it hadn't been for something she said."
Fred: "What did she say?"
George: "No!"
* * *