* * *

A NOBLE AIM

She: "Have you heard anything about the woman's Reform Club?"

"Yes, its object seems to be to reform everything except the Club and everybody except the members."

* * *

ONCE TOO OFTEN

"Yes, dear, I'm going out to-night. I've been asked to take supper with an old comrade in arms."

"By the way, darling, how many men did your regiment muster?"

* * *

"Phwat's the matter wid yez, Regan? Yez look hurted."