* * *

Irate Parent: "While you stood at the gate bidding my daughter good-night, did it ever dawn upon you—"

The Suitor: "Certainly not, sir! I never stayed as late as that."

* * *

Wife: "My dear, we've simply got to change our family doctor. He's so absent-minded. Why, this afternoon he was examining me with his stethoscope, and while he was listening he called out suddenly, 'Halloa! Who is it speaking?'"

* * *

Mrs. Goodheart: "I am soliciting for the poor. What do you do with your cast-off clothing?"

Mr. Hardup: "I hang them up carefully and go to bed. Then I put them on again in the morning."

* * *