The Client: "I bought and paid for two dozen glass decanters that were advertised at $16 a dozen, f. o. b., and when they were delivered they were empty."

The Lawyer: "Well, what do you expect?"

The Client: "Full of booze. Isn't that what f. o. b. means?"

* * *

During a conversation between an Irishman and a Jew, the Irishman asked how it was that the Jews were so wise.

"Because," said the Jew, "we eat a certain kind of fish;" and he offered to sell one for ten dollars.

After paying his money, the Irishman received a small dried fish. He bit into it, then exclaimed: "Why, this is only a smoked herring."

"See?" said the Jew. "You are getting wise already."

* * *