“Oh! nobody can be more satirical; indeed, what difference is there between wit and satire? Come, Count!”
And Hamilton introduced me forthwith to Madame de Cornuel. She received me very politely; and, turning to two or three people who formed the circle round her, said, with the greatest composure, “Messieurs, oblige me by seeking some other object of attraction; I wish to have a private conference with my new friend.”
“I may stay?” said Hamilton.
“Ah! certainly; you are never in the way.”
“In that respect, Madame,” said Hamilton, taking snuff, and bowing very low, “in that respect, I must strongly remind you of your excellent husband.”
“Fie!” cried Madame de Cornuel; then, turning to me, she said, “Ah! Monsieur, if you could have come to Paris some years ago, you would have been enchanted with us: we are sadly changed. Imagine the fine old King thinking it wicked not to hear plays, but to hear players act them, and so making the royal family a company of comedians. Mon Dieu! how villanously they perform! but do you know why I wished to be introduced to you?”
“Yes! in order to have a new listener: old listeners must be almost as tedious as old news.”
“Very shrewdly said, and not far from the truth. The fact is, that I wanted to talk about all these fine people present to some one for whose ear my anecdotes would have the charm of novelty. Let us begin with Louis Armand, Prince of Conti; you see him.”
“What, that short-sighted, stout, and rather handsome man, with a cast of countenance somewhat like the pictures of Henri Quatre, who is laughing so merrily?”
“O Ciel! how droll! No! that handsome man is no less a person than the Duc d’Orleans. You see a little ugly thing like an anatomized ape,—there, see,—he has just thrown down a chair, and, in stooping to pick it up, has almost fallen over the Dutch ambassadress,—that is Louis Armand, Prince of Conti. Do you know what the Duc d’Orleans said to him the other day? ‘Mon bon ami,’ he said, pointing to the prince’s limbs (did you ever see such limbs out of a menagerie, by the by?) ‘mon bon ami, it is a fine thing for you that the Psalmist has assured us “that the Lord delighteth not in any man’s legs.”’ Nay, don’t laugh, it is quite true!”