The only things that haven’t changed since Wilhelm butted in

To show how Armageddon should be run

Are the views of Thomas Atkins as to who is going to win,

And his personal opinion of the Hun.

Punch.

BOOZE FIGHTERS

An inquisitive old lady asked a royal defense corps veteran what the letters “R. D. C.” meant.

“Reformed Drunkards’ Corps, ma’am,” he replied solemnly.

“Dear me,” she murmured, “what miracles those recruiting sergeants do perform!”

VERY PROPER ANSWER