"Having o'ermastered them you set upon, do you carry them into some covert, where you search so severely that nothing can be hidden from you. If in this strict enquiry, gold be found privily quilted in a doublet, or in the waistband of his breeches, I can hardly forbear smiling when I think in what manner the rogues will rate the poor man with 'villain,' or 'cheating rascal,' for endeavouring to preserve his own, whilst he has nothing else to say but that he is 'undone,' which they regard as little as the hangman will them at the place of execution. Having then changed your horse for theirs, if better than your own, the next thing to do is to make them swear neither to follow you, nor to raise the country with a hue-and-cry upon you. Thus, leaving the poor traveller forlorn, you ride to some strange place, or else where you are known and winked at, and there you share that which you unlawfully have got, not without cheating one another.
"Now here, by the way, give me leave to descant on their prodigality, after a successful attempt. London, the more is the pity, is their best sanctuary, and therefore, after any robbery, they commonly repair thither; having as many names as lodgings. Their next care is to buy a variety of splendid apparel, and, having bought their wenches new gowns, and furnished their pockets with guineas, they then prosecute all manner of debaucheries. Their hosts must also participate in their gains, else all the fat's in the fire; for the vintners, innkeepers, etc., knowing very well what they are, and how easily they get their money, will be sure to enlarge their reckoning and make it swell prodigiously; neither must this be complained of, lest they refuse to keep their own counsel any longer.
"All the time they can spare from robbing and undoing poor men is spent in wine and women; so that the sunshine of their prosperity lasts but a moment, not so long as to warm their hands by the blazing fire of their prodigality, before cold death comes and seizeth them. And how can it be otherwise expected? the pitcher goes not so often to the well but it comes broken home at last.
"But before death takes them from this, to carry them before a higher tribunal, there to answer for all they have enacted here on earth, there is a punishment preceding this: it is a prison wherein are contained so many tortures, woes, and pains that I do think were enough to punish, without death, the greatest of offences.
"Having thus endeavoured to fright highwaymen, by showing them the intolerable torments of a prison, besides the certainty and shamefulness of hanging, and hazard of eternal death hereafter, I shall here take another course to scare them, if possible, and therefore in the first place I shall lay down directions how to know them as they ride on the road, with rules how to shun them, or, if robbed, how to pursue and apprehend them when they think themselves most secure.
"In the first place, when at any time you intend to travel, and cannot avoid carrying a sum of money with you, let no person know what charge you have, or when you will set forward. It is the custom, I confess (but let me assure you, it is dangerous), for men the day before they begin their journey, to take leave of their relations and friends, drinking healths round to the happy return of the traveller, who suspects not the least harm in all this; whereas, it hath been known that a father hath this way been betrayed by his own son; a brother by a brother; nay, one pretendedly dear friend by another, by discovering to highwaymen when and which way he rides; and so for the plot he goes his share.
"Another way they have. The gang shall ride in advance, out of sight, leaving one lusty fellow of their company behind, who shall ride very slowly, expecting some one or other will overtake him. If overtaken by three or four, he will single out the one he thinks hath most money; and, pretending much friendliness, will whisper, he likes not those other men, and ask if he knows them. If not, he adviseth him to slacken his pace, for certainly they are dangerous fellows. The timorous and credulous traveller will thank him for his advice; and not long afterwards, by parting company with honest men, he will be brought alone to the place where the confederates lie in ambuscade. The decoy will then draw his weapon, bidding the traveller do the like, and now begins a dangerous fight, as the traveller imagines. Fearing bloodshed, he delivers his money, and persuades his champion to do the like, who, with much ado, at length condescends thereunto. The gang, having given him a private indication of the way they intend to ride, then set spurs to their horses, and are out of sight in an instant.
"Hereupon, this pretender to honesty will straight persuade you to assist him in making a hue-and-cry, in the carrying on of which he will seemingly be foremost, but to no other end than to lead you quite another way, till his brethren be out of all danger. I knew one notorious rogue, who by his sly and crafty deportment was looked upon to be a very honest gentleman, who suffered himself to be robbed with three more, by his own confederates. The robbery being committed between sun and sun, he, with those three honest men, sued the county, and recovered the money they had lost.
"Whensoever the traveller designs a journey, let him consider that the Sabbath day is a time not only unlawful, but more dangerous for robbing than any other. I need not expatiate on the illegality of the act, since there is a special command forbidding the breach of that holy day of rest, the violation whereof hath been frequently punished by being robbed; for, to speak the truth, that day hath been, and still is, chosen by highwaymen for the best and fittest time to commit their robberies; first because they are sensible that few travel then, except those who ride on some important concern, and who they suppose carry a considerable sum about them.
"In the next place, on that day the roads are most quiet, being undisturbed with great quantities of people, and therefore they rob with more ease and greater security. Lastly, they know the county will not be so forward to pursue them with a hue-and-cry, and are quite convinced that a judge will hardly be induced to make the county pay the reparation of a loss sustained by him who ought to have stayed at home, to perform those duties required from him, proper to the day; and not wander abroad and leave his Creator's business undone, that he may do his own. If you must needs travel, you have days enough in the week to follow your urgent and important affairs, and with more security, the roads being then full of good company, if you will but make choice of a convenient time, and be cautious whom you entertain into your society.