“‘A couple of ducks coming, sir,’ says the waiter.
“‘Confound your ducks! What with your pork and ducks, you’ll make the whole inside of the coach reek with onions and vulgarity.’
“‘There’s a cold collation on the side-table, sir, if you prefer cold meat.’
“‘Hang your cold collation! have you got any real Devonshire cider in the house?’
“‘Yes, sir; some very excellent.’
“‘Then bring me a bottle, and a toothpick.’
“‘Now, look here, waiter,’ says one of the diners, ‘there are the horses out already, and we have not half done yet: blow me if I go before the half-hour’s up.’
“‘Take any cheese, sir?’ asks the waiter.
“‘No, to be sure, not yet; have you no tarts?’
“‘Why, none, I am afraid, that we can recommend, sir; but there’s some very nice cold plum-pudding you can have.’