“Oh, of course, of course. Still—if you won't be offended, ma'am—times are changed since then. It was a very small place, where news spread of itself; and all that cannot be written for theatrical agents, because there wasn't one in creation.”
“And so now their little customs, lately invented, like themselves, are to prevail against God's im-mor-tal law!” It was something half way between Handel and mellowed thunder the way her grand contralto suddenly rolled out these three words. Joseph was cunning. He put on a crushed appearance, deceived by which the firm but gentle Klosking began to soften her tone directly.
“It has given me pain,” said she, sorrowfully. “And I am afraid God will be angry with us both for our ostentation.”
“Not He,” said Joseph, consolingly. “Bless your heart, He is not half so irritable as the parsons fancy; they confound Him with themselves.”
Ina ignored this suggestion with perfect dignity and flowed on: “All I stipulate now is that I may not see this pitiable parade in print.”
“That is past praying for, then,” said Ashmead, resolutely. “You might as well try to stop the waves as check publicity—in our day. Your munificence to the poor—confound the lazy lot!—and the gratitude of those pompous prigs, the deputation—the presentation—your admirable reply—”
“You never heard it, now—”
“Which, as you say, I was not so fortunate as to hear, and so must content myself with describing it—all this is flying north, south, east, and west.”
“Oh no, no, no! You have not advertised it?”
“Not advertised it! For what do you take me? Wait till you see the bill I am running up against you. Madam, you must take people as they are. Don't try to un-Ashmead me; it is impossible. Catch up that knife and kill me. I'll not resist; on the contrary, I'll sit down and prepare an obituary notice for the weeklies, and say I did it. BUT WHILE I BREATHE I ADVERTISE.”