So I was barred. This was serious. I walked out into the street thinking. Spencer looked like getting his own way. I knew I was up against a powerful mob, and I knew when to quit. It looked to me right then that I’d better pack up and move to another State.
I was feeling pretty low by the time I got back to the fishing-lodge. I didn’t want to worry Mardi, but at the same time I wanted her to know just how I stood. I didn’t know how far Spencer’s influence carried. He was rich enough to carry weight with all the nationals. If the bosses had shares in this phoney business, they’d be glad to give him my head on a plate.
I walked up the drive, after I had parked the car in the garage. There was no sign of Mardi. I went quietly so that I should surprise her.
On my way up-town I’d got her two pairs of silk stockings. I’d felt pretty mushy buying them, but once I got clear of the shop I was glad. I guessed she would be pleased, because up to now I hadn’t bought her anything.
I beetled into the hall and made for the kitchen. She wasn’t there. So I went into the dining-room. The light was burning, but she wasn’t there either. I was just going upstairs when I saw something that brought me up short.
I stood there feeling cold chills running through me, and a sick feeling gathering inside me. I tried to kid myself that the two dark stains at my feet were paint stains, but I knew they weren’t. Slowly, I knelt down and touched one of them with my finger-tips. It was wet and sticky.
I stood up, looking at my fingers in the electric light. They were a bright red. Without knowing what I was doing I walked into the kitchen and let the water from the sink tap run over my hands. Deliberately I took a towel and wiped them dry.
I was so scared and sick that I was afraid to do anything else. I just stood there holding the towel, sweating ice. I heard myself say out loud: “Don’t let them have killed her… don’t let them have killed her… please, God… don’t let them have killed her.”
I told myself I’d have to go and look. I had to go upstairs and see where she was, but that’s as far as I could go. Nothing would get me out of the kitchen and upstairs.
I put the towel away after folding it carefully. I had to do something. I went back to the middle of the kitchen and stood there waiting. I said to myself that Mardi would come in in a moment from the garden, but I knew she wouldn’t. Katz had found her, and he had killed her; that I knew was what had happened, but I wouldn’t let myself believe it. I kept saying she’d be along in a moment or so, that the stuff on the floor outside was paint, it just couldn’t be Mardi’s blood, but I knew it was.