PATIENCE—And how handsome you look.
GROSVENOR—You are quite right, Patience (drawing himself up). I am a Chicago & Alton Railroad Conductor, and they are all very beautiful.
PATIENCE—And that uniform, Archibald!
GROSVENOR—(Sighs) Ah, that is the bane of my life. It has the curse of fatal perfection. Since I first put it on I dare not go through the cars and collect tickets without an escort. All the women I meet fall madly in love with me. At the country depot when my train goes through, the entire female population flock out to get a glimpse at me. The life is one of torment.
PATIENCE—Then why do you not cast it away from you, and make yourself a commonplace person like the conductors of other roads?