What article that we wear is most affectionate? A porous plaster, because it becomes very much attached to us.
Why is a pawnbroker like a drunkard? Because he takes the pledge but cannot always keep it.
Who does the Bible say may carry on a flirtation? It says widow’s mite (might).
Why are respectable hotels like the elysium of the gods? Because no bad spirits are permitted to enter them.
Why is grass like a mouse? Because the cat’ll eat it (cattle eat it).
Why are convicts like old maids going to be married? Because they go off in transports.
How do we know the fair queen of day has a lover? She is always followed by a night (knight).
Why are the Irish poor like a carpet? Because they are kept down by tax (tacks).
Why is the world like a slate? Because the children of men do multiply thereon.
Why is a defeated army like wool? Because its worsted.