When is a soldier like a king? When he appears with his pomp-on.

What object is walking over the water and under the water, yet does not touch the water? A woman crossing a bridge over a river with a pail of water on her head.

Why is love like a canal boat? Because it is an internal transport.

When does a chair dislike you? When it can’t bear you.

Why is a duel quickly managed? Because it takes only two seconds to arrange it.

What burns to keep a secret? Sealing-wax.

Why is a nobleman like a book? Because he has a title.

What class of women are most apt to give tone to society? The belles.

What is that which has a mouth but never speaks, and a bed but never lies in it? A river.

Why is a defeated army like wool? Because it is worsted.