What moral lesson does the weather cock teach? It is vane to a-spire.
When is a lawyer like a beast of burden? When drawing a conveyance.
When is a soldier like a watch? When he is on guard.
What are the embers of the expiring year? Nov-ember and Dec-ember.
How is a poultry dealer compelled to earn his living? By foul means.
When was beef tea first introduced into England? When Henry VIII dissolved the Pope’s bull.
Why is a butcher’s cart like his top boots? Because he carries his calves there.
Why does a maltese cat rest better in summer than in winter? Because summer brings a caterpillar (cat-a-pillow).
Is there anything a man with a kodak cannot take? Yes, a hint.
Why do American soldiers never run away? They belong to a standing army.