On a time the men of Gotham had forgotten to pay their rents to their landlord; so one said the other, to-morrow must be pay-day, by whom can we send our money? So one said, I have this day taken a hare, and she may carry it, for she is very quick footed; be it so, replied the rest; she shall have a letter, and a purse to put our money in, and we can direct her the way. When the letter was written and the money put into a purse, they tied them about the hare’s neck, saying, You must first go to Loughborough, and then to Leicester, and at Newark is our landlord; then commend us to him, and there is his due. The hare, as soon as she got out of their hands, ran quite a contrary way.—Some said, Thou must first go to Loughborough; others said, Let the hare alone, for she can tell a nearer way than the best of us; let her go.
TALE IX.
A man of Gotham, that went mowing in the meadow, found a large grasshopper He instantly threw down his scythe, and ran home to his neighbour, and said that the devil was at work in the field, and was hopping among the grass. Then was every man ready with their clubs, staves, halberts, and other weapons, to kill the grasshopper. When they came to the place where the grasshopper was, said one to the other, let every man cross himself from the devil, for we will not meddle with him. So they returned again, and said, We are blest this day that we went no farther. O ye cowards! said he that left the scythe in the meadow, help me to fetch my scythe. No, answered they, it is good to sleep in a whole skin. It is much better for thee to lose thy scythe than to mar us all.
TALE X.
On a certain time there were twelve men of Gotham that went to fish; some waded in the water, and some stood on dry land. In going home, one said to the other, we have ventured wonderfully in wading, I pray God that none of us did come from home to be drowned. Nay, marry, said one to the other, let us see that, for there did twelve of us come out. Then they told themselves, and every one told eleven. Said the one to the other, there is one of us drowned. They then went back to the brook, where they’d been fishing, and sought up and down for him that was drowned, making great lamentation. A courtier coming by, asked what it was they sought for, and why they were sorrowful. Oh, said they, this day we went to fish in the brook; twelve of us came out together, and one is drowned. The courtier said, tell how many there be of you. One of them told eleven, but he did not tell himself. Well, said the courtier, what will you give me, and I will find the twelfth man? All the money we have got, said they. Give me the money, said he. He began with the first, and gave him a stroke over the shoulders with his whip, that made him groan, saying, here is one, and so he served them all, and they groaned at the matter. When he came to the last, he paid him well, saying, here is the twelfth man. God’s blessings on thee said they, for finding our brother.
TALE XI.
A man of Gotham, riding along the highway, saw a cheese, so drew his sword and pricked it with the point, in order to pick it up. Another man who came by, alighted, picked it up, and rode away with it. The man of Gotham rides to Nottingham to buy a long sword to pick up the cheese, and returning to the place where it did lie, he pulled out his sword, pricked the ground, and said, if I had had but this sword I should have had the cheese myself, but now another has come before me and got it.
TALE XII.
A man in Gotham, that did not love his wife, and she having fair hair, he said divers times he would cut it off, but durst not do it when she was awake, so he resolved to do it when she was asleep; therefore, one night he took a pair of shears and put them under his pillow, which his wife perceiving, said to her maid, go to bed to my husband, to-night, for he intends to cut off my hair; let him cut off thy hair, and I will give thee as good a kirtle as ever thou didst see. The maid did so, and feigned herself asleep, which the man perceiving, cut off her hair, wrapped it about the shears, and, laying them under the pillow, fell asleep. The maid arose, and the wife took the hair and shears, and went to the hall and burnt the hair. The man had a fine horse that he loved, and the goodwife went into the stable, cut off the hair of the horse’s tail, wrapped the shears up in it, and laid them under the pillow again.—Her husband, seeing her combing her head in the morning, marvelled thereat. The girl, seeing her master in a deep study, said, What ails the horse in the stable, he has lost his tail? The man ran into the stable, and found the horse’s tail was cut off; then going to the bed, he found the shears wrapped up in his horse’s tail. He then went to his wife, saying, I crave thy mercy, for I intended to cut off thy hair, but I have cut off my own horse’s tail. Yea, said she, self do self have. Many men think to do a bad turn, but it turneth oft times to themselves.