"I will proceed to describe this visit, which took place through a declaration on his part in a former letter that the desire to see me sprang from the consideration evinced by me concerning his everlasting welfare. This induced me to receive him accordingly, praying to God to be with me every moment of the time, directing even my dress. This He did, letting me be dressed on the occasion as HE pleased, which, as my Diary relates, was in my old turned dark green merino gown, daily worn,—not permitting me to be decorated in any way likely to attract notice, which, as the employment in view was of so sacred a nature, was neither required nor obtained.
"Having committed myself on my knees into his gracious hand, 'whose I am and whom I serve,' to do with me whatever seemed agreeable to His unerring will, I descended the stairs after the Duke was announced, with these words from dear Mrs. L. following me: 'Now if the Lord should send his arrow into his soul!' (She had fancied from the commencement that God intended to exalt me for the purpose of showing forth his praise, so that this impression must necessarily have been powerfully strengthened by what followed.)
"I entered the Parlour, where, standing before the fire, I beheld anything but the kind of individual personally imagined. I had not had the slightest idea that the Duke has such a beautiful, silver head, such as I always from my childhood admired, inducing me as I approached to offer my hand with additional pleasure, saying, 'This is very kind of Your Grace!' He received my hand graciously and respectfully,—but spoke not a word. I then requested him to be seated, two chairs having been placed for that purpose each side of the fire,—and occupied one of them myself; when recollecting the purport of his visit, I immediately rose, saying, 'I will show you my Treasure!' He also rose, standing until I re-seated myself with this large beautiful Bible in my arms. I placed it upon the table between us, opening it at the Third Chapter of Saint John's Gospel, announcing the same. On arriving at the seventh verse thereof, containing this momentous passage, flowing from the divine lips of him who spoke as never man spake, 'Ye must be born again,' I, as is usual with me, raised my hand, pointing my finger emphatically, with the solemnity so important an occasion demanded, being desirous to impress the same on his mind, when to my astonishment he eagerly seized my hand, exclaiming, as before described: 'Oh, how I love you!' This was his first utterance!...
"Should any one consider strange the expression of agonizing applied to the Duke's feelings at the time he seized my hand, and exclaimed as written, I can only say that such an expression seems hardly doing justice thereto in my estimation. Nor can I find any language adequate to display the same, for God appeared to have struck the Duke dumb on beholding me, giving him no power of speech until he betrayed the effect such had on him. He seemed determined from first to last to overcome or conceal these feelings; yet on one occasion, with great solemnity of voice and manner, on my questioning him concerning who caused him to feel thus towards me, he replied,
"'God Almighty.'"
One hesitates how to comment upon this singular interview. As has been said, the Duke was at the time of its occurrence sixty-five years old, a father and a grandfather. Under no circumstances was he a man likely to fall in love at first sight, even with so beautiful and interesting a woman as Miss J. Yet the length of time that the correspondence endured, as well as the tone he generally observed of interest in her plans, of solicitude for her health, and the readiness with which he renewed his letters when some misunderstanding had for a while interrupted them, all go to prove that he must have had a feeling for her of more than common interest. Miss J. does not demur at avowing her affection for him again and again. In later years, when there had been a decided break between them, she writes of him constantly as "my still-loved, precious Duke."
That the Duke did not have a general reputation for softness of heart, even among those who knew him well, may be gathered from Greville's comments. He styles the Duke:—
"A man of great energy, decision, and authority. The Duke is a very hard man; he takes no notice of any of his family, he never sees his mother, has only visited her two or three times in the last few years, and has not now been to see Lady Anne, though she has been in such affliction for the death of her only son, and he passes her door every time he goes to Strathfieldsaye.... He is a very extraordinary man certainly, and with many contradictions in his character.... He will not endure any one who will not be subservient to him."
Several passages in the Duke's letters to Miss J. written when there had been deaths among his friends or in his family, lead one to modify the estimate made of him by Greville, who was always too apt to let his personal prejudices color his statements. M'Carthy declares that while the Duke was cold and brusque in manner, his affections were warm and enduring. This softer side of his nature was evidently that shown to Miss J. The oddest part of the affair was that he should have betrayed it on such short acquaintance.
On parting from Miss J. the Duke told her he should be absent from town for several days, but would call upon her on his return. At his request she promised to write to him. This she afterwards found "the Lord of Lords" would not permit.