Why is whispering in company like a forged bank note? Because it is uttered but not allowed.
Which constellation resembles an empty fireplace? The Great Bear.
What is the last remedy for a smoky chimney? Putting the fire out.
Why is a clever wit like a chemist? Because he has many a good retort.
Why is a bankrupt husband an ardent lover? Because his is unremitting affection.
What is the difference between a spendthrift and a feather bed? One is hard up and the other soft down.
What comes after cheese? Mouse.
Why is a mouse entering a mouse trap like a diplomat arguing his policy? Because each has a well-defined end in view.
When may a man be said to breakfast before he gets up? When he takes a roll in bed.
When are volunteers not volunteers? When they are mustered (mustard).