Why is a lover's heart like a whale? Because it's a secreter (sea creatur') of great sighs (size).
How many wives are you allowed by the Prayer-book? Sixteen, viz.: Fo(u)r better, fo(u)r worser, fo(u)r richer, fo(u)r poorer; total, sixteen.
Why is paper like a beggar? Because it is composed of rags.
Why can Satan never be uncivil? Because the Imp o' Darkness can never be Imp o' Light.
Who is the man who carries everything before him? The footman.
Why is a pen manufacturer a corrupt man? Because he makes people steal (steel) pens and tells them they do write (right).
What is the greatest eye-sore in a farmyard? A pig-sty.
What is better than God, worse than the devil, what the dead live on, and the living would die if they lived on? Nothing.
Why is a prudent man like a pin? Because his head prevents him from going too far.
Whence proceeds the eloquence of a lawyer? From his mouth.