In those large meetings, where Friends are collected from various parts, the weak and the strong together, and especially in those for worship, it is essentially necessary that Friends get inward, and wait in their proper gifts, keeping in view their standing and place in society, especially those in the ministry. For otherwise there is danger, even from a desire to do good, of being caught with the enemies’ transformations, particularly with those that are young, and inexperienced; for we seldom sit in meetings but some prospect presents, which has a likeness, in its first impression, to the right thing; and as these feel naturally fearful of speaking in large meetings, and in the presence of their elderly friends, and apprehending they are likely to have something to offer, they are suddenly struck with the fear of man, and thereby prevented from centering down to their gifts, so as to discover whether it is a right motion or not; and the accuser of the brethren, who is always ready with his transformations to deceive, charges with unfaithfulness and disobedience, by which they are driven to act without any clear prospect, and find little to say, except making an apology for their thus standing; by which they often disturb the meeting, and prevent others, who are rightly called to the work, and thereby wound the minds of the living baptized members.
On second day the meeting for discipline opened, and continued by adjournments until sixth day. Although divers weaknesses were manifest, in transacting the business, for want of a deep indwelling with the pure spring of life, and each patiently abiding in his own proper gift, without envying others, yet, I think, in the main it was a favoured meeting. Divers brethren were largely opened to speak to subjects of concern, which came before us, in the life, and in the clear demonstration of the spirit, as scribes well instructed, bringing out of the heavenly treasury things new and old.
First day, the 4th of 6th month. Being invited to the funeral of a young woman within the compass of Westbury meeting, I attended that meeting, which was very large, much more so than usual, occasioned in part by the funeral. Although the forepart of the meeting was dull and exercising, yet, as my mind centered under a patient exercise and travail, way gradually opened to communication, in which I was enabled, through adorable condescension, largely and livingly to declare to the people of the things concerning the kingdom of heaven, and their own present and everlasting peace. It was a season of great favour, thankfully to be remembered.
The rest of this week I spent at home, in peace of mind.
First day, the 11th. My mind was brought under exercise, as I sat in our meeting, in remembrance of Paul’s declaration, where he says, “For all seek their own, not the things which are Jesus Christ’s.” As I continued under the exercise, way opened to communication, which brought a comfortable solemnity over the meeting.
Second and third days. I spent in attending our meeting for sufferings in New-York; an appointment which I have been under for nearly forty years.
Fourth day. Most of this day spent in some necessary repairs about my house. Much is saved by timely and prudent care.
Fifth day. Was our monthly meeting, at which we had the acceptable company of our friend John Comly, a fellow-labourer in the gospel, with whom I felt near sympathy and unity in travail. I accompanied him the next day to a meeting he had appointed at Martinicock; in which he was favoured with a pretty large testimony, in the plainness and simplicity of the gospel. I took my leave of him and his companion Stephen Comfort that afternoon, and returned home.
Seventh day. Spent in my common avocations, and the week closed with a peaceful mind.