On the 23rd of March the Duchess of Brunswick[[138]] died. Sir Henry Halford brought the news to me at eleven at night. Princess Charlotte was much affected, and lamented not having lately visited her. But she had kept away from delicacy, on account of the painful affairs relative to the Princess of Wales. She wrote immediately to the Prince, to the Princess, and to the Duke of Brunswick. Next day she wrote to Princess Sophia of Gloucester, who was particularly attached to the Duchess; and the Duke of Gloucester sent a gentleman to me to inquire after Princess Charlotte. It was wonderful to see the kindness and energy with which this young person of seventeen acted on this occasion. She wished to have gone to see the Duchess, her grandmother, after her death, for her mind was not easy at having kept away from her during the last month or two; but Lady Anne Smith and the Duchess of Leeds—particularly Lady Anne—persuaded her not to go.
I must own that I had rather encouraged this idea when she started it, for I thought it proceeded from the best of motives, and I considered that royal personages are in general less prepared for the troubles of this life, because they are spared almost all painful and disagreeable scenes. Everybody, however, chose to interfere with respect to Princess Charlotte, under pretence of excessive anxiety for her happiness and welfare.
On the 25th the Prince called, and offered to Princess Charlotte that she should visit her mother at Blackheath.[[139]] She went, attended by the Duchess and myself, on the 26th, and we passed a very quiet and comfortable day. The Princess of Wales looked better than I ever saw her. She appeared to be affected and subdued, and was particularly so when we came away, saying how uncertain it was when she should be allowed to see her daughter again. Lady Charlotte Lindsay was in waiting.
About this time Miss Mercer Elphinstone came to Town, and Princess Charlotte wrote to ask the Regent’s permission for seeing her; which was granted. It was evident that this had been arranged beforehand, and that the conditions were that Miss Mercer, who had more influence than any one with Princess Charlotte, should open her eyes to her mother’s imprudence, and break the confidential intimacy between them. That this intimacy must in some degree be prejudicial to Princess Charlotte there were reasons enough to prove; but great delicacy was requisite on this subject, and perhaps not quite sufficient was observed, which gave room for false rumours amongst some Opposition people (particularly the violent ones) that Princess Charlotte was won over by fêtes and balls, and had given up her mother. These rumours were, I believe, underhand, seconded by the agents of Carlton House, who had before spread the most infamous falsehoods about Captain Fitzclarence, &c.
I soon perceived the change, and also some difference of conduct towards myself. Princess Charlotte left off shaking hands with me when we met in the morning and parted at night—a circumstance trifling in itself, and unnecessary where people live in the same house together; but it was accompanied by hints that when she had an establishment her ladies should be kept at a distance, and a short time after that her ladies ought to be Peeresses, or of the highest connexions. I could easily guess whence all this was derived, but I said nothing.
One evening, however, Lady Anne Smith speaking very kindly of the advantage she thought Princess Charlotte had reaped from my being with her, her Royal Highness seemed embarrassed, which upset me; I burst into tears, and was obliged to remain in my room that evening. Next day Princess Charlotte hinted something about jealousy, of which I took no notice; but I perceived her mind had been poisoned.
I resolved, however, to go on doing my duty, and could not blame her for preferring the advice of a person whom she had known intimately for many years, who was shrewd, had talents, and a decision of character often very useful. It appeared to me an amiable trait in Princess Charlotte’s character, and, as she did not treat me ill, I could not bring myself to be angry with her, though it necessarily changed my mode of proceeding. I could no longer be as open as I had been; and though I did not deceive her, and, when necessary, told her exactly what I thought, I was obliged to be on my guard, and to wait sometimes for days before I could hint anything which I was anxious for her to know. Miss Mercer appeared shy of me; and things were in this state when we were asked one day to dinner at Carlton House. It was just after the discovery of the body of Charles I. in the subterranean chapel at Windsor,[[140]] and the Prince was acting the manner of decapitation on my shoulders. He was in good humour, and had given to Princess Charlotte the centre sapphire of Charles’s crown, which he had received with the papers of the Stuart family from Rome. This dinner party was very dull. It consisted of Miss Goldsworthy and the Duke of Clarence (both of whom fell asleep after the second course), the Duke of Cambridge and Colonel Bloomfield.
About a week after, on the 11th of April, we were sent to Windsor for a fortnight, as Easter was approaching. Princess Charlotte, whose real goodness of heart could not be entirely warped, took me in the carriage with her straight to the Castle, where the Duchess was to meet us. I was anxious to take my leave when I had accompanied her into the room, and I had written to Miss Roberts[[141]] to say I would dine with her, but it was agreed that as the Queen and Royal Family were just going into the dinner-room, Princess Elizabeth should ask whether I was to dine there. To me nothing could be so disagreeable. The answer of the Queen was, that as I was there I might stay; but I was afterwards told that she had said to the Duke of Cambridge, as he handed her in, that she now did more for the Prince’s daughter than she had ever done for her own children; for that she never sat down with their sub-governesses. This being repeated to me by the Princesses, I found it necessary to write the following letter to the Prince on the subject, more particularly as other affronts of a similar nature were put upon me:
MISS KNIGHT TO THE PRINCE REGENT.
Sir,—As I am well aware of the many and important occupations which engross the time of your Royal Highness, I am sincerely concerned at being under the necessity of arresting your attention for a few moments; but I am convinced that your Royal Highness would think me unworthy of the situation in which you have been pleased to place me, if I could tamely submit to the treatment which I have experienced since my arrival at Windsor.