SUSAN. (surprised) Hey? What's that?
GRANDMA. (gently) All the faculty and students curtsey when they come into my presence, Miss Jones. It is a sweet old-fashioned custom—
SUSAN. (briskly) Well, I'll soon change that—I mean, Howdy! Howdy! (bobs several times) (aside) I must not forget I am here as a spy in the enemy's country. If you are going to do the Romans you must do as the Romans do. (to GRANDMA) Swell joint you've got here, old lady.
GRANDMA, (rubbing knees) Swell joints? Yes, my dear, a little rheumatiz makes the joints swell. But I don't complain. I'm an old lady. I have to expect some aches and pains at my time of life. I'm thankful I can do a little good work in the world. Do you understand What your duties will be?
SUSAN. Sure Mike! I'm the Husbandology lady. I teach the girls how to treat their husbands when they get 'em.
GRANDMA. Just so. You will lecture on How to Coddle and Pet a Husband. Five lectures. Then you will give five lectures on Smoothing the Lines of
Care from Hubby's Brow. Then—of course you show by example how all this is done.
SUSAN. By example? You don't have a man here, do you?
GRANDMA. We use the practical method in our classes. "Practice makes perfect," you know, (calls) Pauline!
PAULINE, (off stage) Yes'm, I'm comin'.