I was glad to quit such a pack of female dogs. But before I had passed on many steps, I was surprised to see another shoal of imprisoned wenches, twice more detestable than they. Some had been changed into toads, some into
dragons, some into serpents who were swimming and hissing, glavering and butting in a fetid, stagnant pool, much larger than Llyn Tegid. [84] “In the name of wonder,” said I, “what sort of creatures may these be?” “There are here,” said he, “four sorts of wenches, all notoriously bad. First, there are procuresses, with some of the principal lasses of their respective bevies about them. Second, gossiping ladies with a swarm of their news-bearing hags. Third, bouncing madams, and a pack of sneaking curs on both sides of them, for no man, but for downright fear of them, would ever go nigh them. Fourth, scolds, become a hundred times more horrible than vipers, with their poisonous stings going creak, creak to all eternity.”
“I had imagined that Lucifer had been a king of too much courtesy, to put a gentlewoman of my rank with such little petty she-devils as these,” said one, something like a winged serpent, only that she was much more fierce. “O that he would send here, seven hundred of the worst devils in Hell in exchange for thee, thou poisonous hell-spawn!” said another ugly viper. “O! many thanks to you,” said a gigantic devil who overheard them, “we set too much value on our place and merits, to condescend to become mates of yours; and though we are willing to admit that you are fully as competent to torment people as the best of us, we would, nevertheless, not yield up our duties to you.” “And yet,” said the angel softly, “Lucifer has another reason for keeping such a particular watch over these; he knows well, that if they should break out, they would turn all Hell topsy-turvy.” From here we went, still going downward, to a place where I beheld a frightful den, in which was a horrible clamour, the like of
which I had never heard, for swearing, cursing, blaspheming, snarling, groaning, and crying. “Who is here?” said I. “This,” said he, “is the den of the thieves. Here is a swarm of game-keepers, lawyers, stewards, and the old Judas in the midst of them; they have been excessively annoyed at seeing the tailors and weavers above them, in a more comfortable chamber.” Almost before I could turn myself, there came a horse of a devil, bearing a physician and an apothecary, whom he cast down amongst the pedlars and the duffers, for selling bad, rotten ware; but they beginning to fume at being placed in such low company, one of the devils said, “stay, stay! you do deserve a different place,” and cast them down amongst the conquerors and the murderers. There was a multitude shut up here, for playing with false dice and concealing cards; but before I could observe much, I heard, close by the door, a terrible rush and rustle, with a hie! hie! get on! ho! yo! hip! I turned to see what it was; but perceiving nothing but horned goblins, I enquired of my guide whether there were cuckolds amongst the devils? “No,” said he, “they are in a particular cell. These are drovers who would fain escape to the place of the Sabbath-breakers, and are driven hither against their will.” At that word, I looked, and perceived their polls full of the horns of sheep and cattle, and those who drove them, casting them down beneath the feet of the bloodiest robbers. “Crouch there,” said one; “though you feared so much of old the thieves on London road, you were yourselves the very worst species of highwaymen, living upon the road and plundering, yes, and murdering poor families. O how many poor creatures did you not keep, with their hungry mouths open, in vain expectation of the money for the sale of the beasts, which they had intrusted to you; and you in the
mean time in Ireland, or in the King’s Bench laughing at them, or upon the road in the midst of your wine and harlots.”
On quitting this den of furious heat, I got a sight of a lair, exceeding all the rest I had seen in Hell, but one, in frightful stinking filthiness, where was a herd of accursed drunken swine, disgorging and swallowing, swallowing and disgorging, continually and without rest, the most loathsome snivel. The next pit was the couch of gluttony, where Dives and his companions were upon their bellies, eating dirt and fire alternately, without any liquid ever. A cave or two lower there was an exceedingly spacious kitchen, in which some were in a state of roasting and boiling, others frying and burning in an oven half heated. “Behold the place of the merciless and the unfeeling,” said the angel. I then turned a little to the left hand, where there was a cell more light than any one which I had yet seen in Hell, and enquired what place it was? “The abode of the infernal dragons,” replied the angel, “who are hissing and snarling, rushing and preying upon one another every minute.” I approached; and oh! the look which cannot be described was upon them, the whole light was but the living fire in their eyes. “These are the seed of Adam,” said my guide, “morose wretches, and furious savage men; but, yonder,” said he, “are some of the old seed of the great dragon Lucifer;” and verily, I could perceive not a whit more amiability in the one sort than in the other. In the next cellar were the misers, in a state of horrible agony with their hearts cleaving to coffers of burning treasure, the rust whereof was ceaselessly cankering them, because those hearts had been ceaselessly bent upon getting money—O the consuming torment, worse than frenzy, that was now going on within them, with care and repentance. Below this there
was a hanging ledge, where there were some apothecaries ground to dust, and stuffed into earthen pots amongst album grecum, dung of geese and swine, and many an old stinking ointment.
We were now journeying forward, continually descending, along the wilderness of Destruction, through innumerable torments, eternal and not to be described—from cell to cell, from cellar to cellar, and the last always surpassing the others in horror and ghastliness; at last we arrived at a vast porch, more cheerless than any thing we had seen before. It was a very spacious porch, and the pathway through it, which was frightfully steep, led to a kind of dusky nook of incredible ugliness and horror, and there the palace was. At the upper end of the accursed court, among thousands of horrible objects, I could, by means of the radiance of my heavenly companion, perceive amidst the dreary darkness two feet of enormous magnitude, reaching to the roof of the whole infernal firmament. I enquired of my conductor what this horrible thing might be? “Patience,” said he, “you shall obtain a more ample view of this monster as you return; but move forward now to see the royal palace.”
Whilst we were proceeding down the porch of Horror, we heard a noise behind us, as of an immense number of people. Having turned aside to let them pass forward, we beheld four distinct bands, and soon discovered that the four princesses of the city of Destruction, were bringing their subjects as presents to their father. I recognised the princess Pride, not only by her being before the others, but also by her habit of stumbling every moment, for want of looking beneath her feet. She had with her a vast many kings, potentates,
courtiers, gentlemen, and pompous people, many quakers, innumerable females of every rank and degree.