Just as I was rejoicing over the thought that my husband had prosperously accomplished this last journey, I had a letter from him, dated "Hôtel du Nord, Amiens," in which he said he was obliged to stop there till he felt better, for he could eat absolutely nothing, and was very weak. The worst was that I dared not leave my poor little Richard yet, to go to his father: the wound on the temple was not healed, and the doctor had forbidden all excitement, for fear of brain-fever after the shock. I was terribly perplexed when the following letter reached me:—
"HÔTEL DE L'AIGLE NOIR, FONTAINEBLEAU. Mercredi.
"Tu apprendras avec plaisir que j'ai regagné un peu d'appétit hier soir. J'ai mangé un dîner qui m'a fait tant de bien que ce ne serait pas cher à une centaine de francs. Cet hôtel est très propre et la cuisine y est faite convenablement sans mélange de sauces. Toute la journée de lundi à Amiens, j'ai vécu d'un petit morceau de pain d'épices. Le soir à 10 h. 1/2 j'ai mangé une tranche de jambon. Je suis parti à minuit pour Paris où je suis arrivé à 4 h. du matin. Pour ne pas me rendre plus malade, je n'ai pas voulu rester dans la grande ville que j'ai traversée d'une gare à l'autre immédiatement. J'ai pris une tasse de chocolat et écrit quelques lettres en attendant le train pour Fontainebleau qui est parti de la gare à 8 h. C'était un train demi-express, mais je l'ai bien supporté. En arrivant à Fontainebleau je n'ai pas pu déjeuner et je n'ai rien mangé jusqu'au soir quand j'ai bien dîné. C'est très économique de ne pas pouvoir manger. J'ai sauté plusieurs repas, qui par conséquent ne figurent nullement dans les notes.
"Hier soir je me suis promené un peu dans les jardins du palais qui est lui-même vaste, mais c'est un amas de constructions lourdes et de mauvais goût, du moins en général. Cela me fait l'effet d'une caserne ajoutée à une petite ville. Les jardins, les arbres sont magnifiques. Je me trouve bien ce matin, mais un peu faible par suite du peu de nourriture que j'ai pu prendre depuis quelques jours. Enfin, je suis en train de me refaire. Je désire vivement être chez moi, et j'y arriverai aussitôt que possible sans me rendre malade. Embrasse pour moi les enfants et ta mère; à toi de tout coeur."
He reached home safely, but the fatigue and weakness seemed to last longer than previously, and insomnia frequently recurred. He did his best to insure refreshing sleep by taking more exercise in the open air, but it became clear that he must abandon work at night, because when his brain had been working on some particular subject, he could not quiet it at once by going to bed, and it went on—in spite of himself—to a state of great cerebral excitement, during which production was rapid and felicitous—therefore tempting; but it was paid for too dearly by the nervous exhaustion surely following it. It was a great sacrifice on his part, because he liked nothing better than to wait till every one had retired and the house was all quiet and silent, to sit down to his desk under the lamp, and write undisturbed—and without fear of disturbance—till dawn put out the stars.
He now changed his rules, and devoted the evenings to reading.
CHAPTER IX.
1868.
Studies of Animals.—A Strange Visitor.—Illness at Amiens.—
Resignation of post on the "Saturday Review."—Nervous seizure in
railway train.—Mrs. Craik.—Publication of "Etching and Etchers."—
Tennyson.—Growing reputation in America.
In the course of the years 1865-67 Mr. Hamerton had made the acquaintance of several leading French artists,—Doré, Corot, Daubigny, Courbet, Landelle, Lalanne, Rajon, Brunet-Debaines, Flameng, Jacquemart, etc. The etchers he frequently met at Cadart's, where they came to see proofs of their etchings; the painters he went to see for the preparation of his "Contemporary French Painters" and "Painting in France." Together with these works he had begun his first novel, "Wenderholme," and had been contemplating for some time the possibility of lecturing on aesthetics. I was adverse to this last plan on account of his nervous state, which did not seem to allow so great an excitement as that of appearing in public at stated times; I persuaded him at least to delay the realization of the project till he had quite recovered his health, despite the invitations he had received both from England and America. He continued to paint from nature, with the intention of resigning his post on the "Saturday Review" in case of success, but now devoted more of his time to the study of animals, principally oxen, as he liked to have models at hand without leaving home.