[COMMON PRAYER]
A little boy had been brought up with much care. On his eighth birthday he was given a nicely bound Prayer Book by his aunt. After a brief examination he pushed the book on one side disappointedly. On being asked the reason he said, "I don't like anything 'Common.'"
[SHORT COMMONS]
At a shop-window in the Strand there appeared the following notice: "Wanted, two apprentices, who will be treated as one of the family."
[TRUTH]
"My lord," said a witness, "you may believe me or not, but I have stated not a word that is false, for I have been wedded to truth from infancy."
"Yes, sir," replied the Judge drily, "but the question is, how long have you been a widower."
[A WRONG CHOICE]
"I can't stand the missus, sir," said a servant in a complaining voice to her master.
"It's a pity, Mary," said the master sarcastically, "that I couldn't have selected a wife to suit you."