How would you make a thin man fat? Throw him out of a second story window and let him come down plump.
What is the difference between a young maid of sixteen and an old maid of eighty? One is happy and careless and the other is cappy and hairless.
When was fruit known to use bad language? When the first apple cursed the first pair.
If a man gets up on a donkey, where should he get down? From a swan's breast.
What is lengthened by being cut at both ends? A ditch.
"I am what I am; I am not what I follow. If I were what I follow, I should not be what I am." What is it? A footman.
Which is the strongest day of the week? Sunday. All the others are weak days.