1 A Peaceful farmyard in Macedonia. A herd of swine is collecting pearls in silk purses. Swine are more precious in the Balkans than good women.
2 Thomas, the Greek, arrives. He is not a Jew. He despises jewellery and loves pork. He steals a pig. (Inset, the squeal thereof.)
3 Thomas retires to a shady nook and consumes the pig. He regrets it. So does the pig. Crackling is heard.
4 Tom’s father, with his pipe. Pipe goes out. Father goes in. (This is a striking scene.)
5 Thomas descends the street roaring. He is in real pain. Mumm is not the word.
6 Action for assault and barratry, Thomas v. Pater. Judge rules that plaintiff has saved his bacon, and defendant is let off with a fine for being accessory after the fat.
OLD KING COLE
1 Exterior view of Royal Palace. Interior of same—Dining Hall, Piping Room, Bowling Alley, Fiddling Saloon. Queen Cole’s allotment. (Inset, a few vegetables grown by the Princess Anthracite.)
2 The King calls for his pipe. No reply. Boy in street is heard calling “Paiper.” Exit the King to buy one.