NEIGHBORLY COMPLIMENTS
"Tell me, Mrs. Jones, who's that young Adonis your married daughter is looking up to so eagerly?"
"Her husband, Mrs. Snarley!"
"Dear me, you don't say so! I congratulate you.... Now I understand how you come to have such good-looking grandchildren."
GENTLE TERRORISM
The Professor.—"Will you give me a kiss, my dear?"
Effie (an habitually naughty girl).—"Oh, mammie.... I'll be good, I'll be good.... I promise!"
AN UNPLEASANT SOCIAL DUTY
Hostess.—"Geoffrey, I want you to dance with that little girl!"
Geoffrey.—"Oh, well, if I must, I must ...!"