Jan. 8. There were only a few shillings more in hand than was needed for housekeeping today. Nevertheless our kind Father remembered us before the day was over. A sister, a servant, gave me 15s.; also with Ecclesiastes ix. 10, came in 5l. 5s., from two sisters 6s, ld., and by sale of Reports 3s.
Jan. 22. I have repeatedly asked the Lord for means to be able to order more Bibles, as two sorts were again exhausted. There is moreover scarcely enough money in hand to pay the teachers next Saturday. This afternoon I received from a sister 14l. 2s. 7d., which she had had in the Savings Bank. She considered that this money would be better used in the Lords work, than left in the Savings Bank. Thus I was enabled to order some Bibles.
From Jan. 8th to 22nd came in 34l. 9s. 5d. for the Orphans, and the donations were so seasonable, that always either something was given, or articles which had been given for sale could be disposed of, before the last money had been expended. But as there was today again only very little in hand, I was led to open the orphan-box in my house, in which I found two papers, the one containing 10s., the other a 5l. note. In both papers was written Eccles. ix. 10. There came in today still further above 5l. Thus our Lord has sent us what we are likely to need for three or four days to come.
Jan. 25. I have been much in prayer this week about going to Germany: 1, To see certain brethren who purpose to go as Missionaries to the East Indies; and 2, To see my father once more. I am led to go just now, instead of delaying it, because my health is again so failing, that it seems desirable I should leave Bristol at all events, and thus I could continue to serve in the work of the Lord, and yet attend to the benefit of my health at the same time. Lord, keep me from making a mistake in this matter!
Jan, 31, Since Jan. 22 several small donations came in for the Orphans, and several pounds by the sale of silver articles, trinkets, &c. But as I have had to pay out today 11l. 13s., we are now again very poor. For many days past we have been so helped, that money has always come in, before all was spent. Now there is only 1s. 5d. in hand. The Lord will provide! I feel quite comfortable, though in three days I shall have to leave the work for several week.—About three hours after I had written the above, came in 1l. 14s. l 1/2d. In the afternoon I received still further from Tottenham for the Orphans 10l., and in the evening from Hereford 30l., of which latter sum there was 6l. for the Orphans, and 24l. for the other objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. Thus the Lord will kindly allow me to leave a little money behind on my departure, and I have also a still further answer to my prayer for means to purchase Bibles, for which I have asked the Lord repeatedly, and which he began to answer by the donation which I received on the 22nd. I have received 5l. besides for the other objects.
Feb. 1. I have now felt quite sure for several days past, that I should leave Bristol for a season, and go to Germany. If the Lord permit, I shall leave the day after tomorrow.
Feb. 2. Today and yesterday has come in still further, before my departure, nearly 9l. for the Orphans. How kind of the Lord to send this money just now, on the eve of my leaving home!
Feb. 3. Today I left Bristol for Berlin.
On Feb. 5th I left London in the steamer for Hamburg. Though it had been so very stormy for several weeks past, the Lord gate us a very favourable passage; the first, as the captain said, which they had had for several weeks. We landed at Hamburg on the 7th at five in the afternoon. The porter who carried my things led me, as I afterwards found out, some by-way, either to save a long distance, or to get me into the city with my luggage, though it was after the custom-house hours. I did not understand this at first; but, when we were about to enter the city, he told me that that was not the proper way, but that if I would give to the custom-house officer, whom I should presently see at the entrance into the city, a small fee, he would let me pass. My reply was that I did not wish to do what was unlawful, nor should I give a fee to encourage what was unlawful, and that I would rather go a long way round, than get by such means into the city. Presently we arrived at the place at which the custom-house officer stood, who, on my telling him plainly that I had not the least wish to pass that way, if it were unlawful, saw that I was only a passenger, and that I had no wish to get into the city with goods which are not duty free, and therefore let me pass. This little circumstance proves afresh in how many little things the children of God may act differently from the world, to the glory of their Father, and how in going the Lords way, we find it to be, even as far as this life is concerned, the easiest path.—About half an hour after, when I arrived at the hotel, a little circumstance served afresh to remind me, that the Christian, like the bee, might suck honey out of every flower. I saw upon a snuffer-stand in bas-relief, "A heart, a cross under it, and roses under both." The meaning was obviously this, that the heart which bears the cross for a time meets with roses afterwards. I applied it to myself, and this little event greatly cheered my heart in this place, where I was without the fellowship of a single believer.
I left Hamburg in the evening of Feb. 8th, travelled all night, all day, and the whole of the second night, and reached Berlin on the morning of the 10th. I confessed not the Lord Jesus on this long journey, which I record here to my shame; nor did I give any other testimony for Jesus in the steamer, than merely refraining from the light and trifling conversation of the party, and all this after I had had on my way from Bristol to London a fresh encouragement in conversing with a gay traveller addicted to drinking, who evidently listened with a measure of attention, and with a desire of having his chains broken.