"The mercury stood at 50.
"The janitor swore and went out.
"He came back in a minute with another thermometer and hung it alongside of mine. It was a fine one, guaranteed to keep perfect records.
"It marked 65 degrees when he brought it in, and in a minute or two it showed 71. Mine stood still at 50.
"The janitor looked at the two machines and began to grin. I began to unwind the blanket that was around me. The janitor looked scared, but I told him not to run; that I wasn't going to lick him. The only man that I felt like licking was the one who sold me a thermometer that wouldn't go.
"You're the one.
"Now, it's up to you to apologize, give me a machine that is true, or be licked. I've paid my money and you can take your choice."
Mr. Carboline preferred to make the change.
By the way, before I forget it, let me tell you about young Charlie Suitz, a friend of mine, who is really as modest a chap as you would care to meet.